My believer friend and I keep talking, but we always get to the same place-- civil, friendly statements of our respective beliefs. For example, from the discussion I described in my previous post, we ended up in a space where my friend was expressing the belief that intuition is a gift from god while I was expressing my belief that intuition is an accumulation of personal experience that informs (perhaps subconsciously) when extended analysis is impractical. And thats where it hung. My friend actually exclaimed "We always end up having the same discussion in the end, you say your stuff and I say mine!"
So, my question is "How do we learn to talk to each other so each of us hears and understands in a heartfelt way? Ok, so I went with my friend to a workshop where the participants (including me) were to "meet" some enlightened beings and learn to work with them to improve ourselves and potentially make some headway in clearing up our Karma.
I tried. I really did, but the activities just reminded me of simple guided meditations. I enjoyed the meditations (and all of my friends know how much I desperately NEED to get better at meditation, if not for my own health but for that of my loved ones). And I tried to "see" the visitors, but alas, I just didn't. I breathed in white light, and breathed out white light, but still, nothing. I wasn't consciously trying to block. Heck, I've even tried hypnosis (which might have worked, who knows), but I just couldn't connect to my higher self! Maybe, I need to try some peyote or something (just kidding). So, try as I might, I wasn't able to relate..... yet.
So, I'm trying to imagine what it might feel like to be cuddled in a nice warm space, say the palm of an almighty being. This being, I am imagining, loves me and is protecting me and will understand my shortcomings and love me anyway, ultimately welcoming me to 'a better place' somewhere, sometime. It's a nice feeling. Warm and cozy. But..... There is a nagging feeling.... I can't sustain the belief. Its like going to a good movie.... it works as long as the lights are low. As soon as I lift my head, I'm back in "the REAL world" where God allows suffering of innocents. Hhm, guess I really need to keep a constant vigil on this disbelief thing if I hope to discover what believers feel and why. So, I will keep trying, but for now, I still believe there is no God.
But, what about bridging from the other side? So far, I have been completely unsuccessful at trying to get a believer to try even a simple experiment, like watching a video on humanism, or reading a text on physics and "the ether". Gah! It gets frustrating to hear things like "Well you believe that intuition is a gift of God, don't you?". I could manage an outright denial of a non-creationist origin of the universe, if I could get across that I REALLY do think like that! I just want a believer to try, but it seems insurmountable!
Now, I imagine (again) that some of my readers (especially my atheist friends, but maybe even my believer friends) may be thinking "Why? Why try to 'feel' something you don't believe in? Or are you TRYING to not be an 'unbeliever' really?". Well, my rebuttal to that is, again, yes, I really am an atheist, but I don't think deists are going away anytime soon, so we better start understanding them better! I actually feel that religious belief has wrought the worst sorts of crimes on humanity, the planet and other life that lives here. I think it is hubris on the part of atheists to expect mass conversions, but perhaps with a better understanding of what motivates and enriches believers, we can hope to find common ground for solving the worlds ongoing problems. We simply must act cooperatively.
'Til next time...
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